Learning To Say "No"


Every leader needs to learn to say two very important words...yes and no. Everyone likes to say "yes", and most people like to hear it as well. The yes word comes with license to proceed. It brings such positive feelings and reinforces our opinions and actions. What a wonderful word..."YES"...just say it out loud now and enjoy the reinforcement it brings. Then, there is the anti-yes word, the word "no". No isn't nearly as much fun to hear as that comforting yes word. No is also much more difficult to say than yes. Think about it, you never struggle to say yes but you may lie awake all night just knowing you have to say no tomorrow. As an example just imagine as a leader that one of those you lead has asked for money to help them through a difficult time. You know their situation and they are a hard worker and you see nothing that should hinder their receiving this gift of mercy. You can't wait to tell them. You might even violate proper protocol and call them late at night just to say that wonderful word, "YES"! On the other hand, if you know the person has wasted their money, they haven't listened to counsel and continually are asking for money without ever changing their patterns, their answer is a clear "NO". It's only 5:30 in the afternoon but you decide to wait until tomorrow to tell them. What a coward!





Leaders all feel the same pressure to please men but good leaders are willing to pay the price of rejection if need be to deal with those they leads with the purity of love that comes forth in true honesty. If a person needs to hear the no word, saying yes is cowardice and betrayal. If a person is due the yes word, the no word is cruel and harsh. A person who really wants truth will welcome the no word if that is the word of the hour for him. He will also know the yes word, if not deserved, is a word of compromise for him.





Jesus was perfect in his communication skills. He spoke the no word when it was needed and the yes word when it was appropriate. In my life, the no word usually comes before the yes word. The no word causes me to stop and evaluate the motives of my heart and not just my intended actions. Then when the yes word comes, it releases me as one now prepared by the no word for success.





Ask the Lord to help you learn to hear the no word as readily as the yes word. Then, ask him to help you become a leader who can say both yes and no as the situation dictates.